The best humor is more personal, such as hearing trucker jokes to help liven up the trip. Here is our list of the best jokes for truckers. Tell these to your spouse, your fellow team driver, or your dog.
Have a trucker joke you want to share with your fellow truck drivers? Comment below, and we’ll add the best ones to the list!
New Trucker Jokes
How do you get a garbage truck driver to join the Mafia? You make him an offer he can’t refuse! [Updated 8/9/21]
Get a new truck for your spouse. It’ll be a great trade! [Updated 12/17/19] (One Line Fun).
My truck has the best security system in the world. I can leave it parked and unlocked with the keys in the ignition, and nobody steals it!
I tried to get a shipment of fire hydrants from the factory that makes ‘em, but I wasn’t allowed to stop anywhere near the place!
[Updated 12/29/19].
There was a man driving down the road behind an 18-wheeler, at every stoplight the trucker would get out of the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot.
When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. The motorist went up to him and said, “I don’t mean to be nosey but why do you keep banging on that door?”
To which the trucker replied, “Sorry, can’t talk now, I have 20 tons of canaries and a 10-ton limit, so I have to keep half of them flying at all times.”
A genie comes out and says, “Thank you for releasing me, master. I will grant you one wish.”
The trucker thinks for a moment and says, “I would like my own personal, private, toll-free road from New York to California.”
The genie shakes his head and says, “There are far too many federal, state, and local regulations involved, that would be too difficult. Is there anything else you’d rather have?”
The trucker thinks for another minute and says “I wish my wife would stop nagging me.” The genie replies, “All right, how many lanes do you want for that road?”
On the last day of truck driving school Charlie is taking his test, and the examiner is asking him all kinds of questions.
The examiner asks “What would you do if your headlights went out?” and Charlie says “I’d have old Joe, my co-driver, shine a flashlight out the window so we could keep going.”
The examiner says “OK, but you shouldn’t rely on your partner to help you with problems. What if you’re backing up and the trailer starts to jack-knife, what would you do?” and Charlie says “Well, I’d have old Joe, my co-driver, hop out and help direct me.”
The examiner says “I guess that would help but you shouldn’t rely on your co-driver all the time.”
For his last question the examiner decides he’s going to give a question that no co-driver in the world can help with!
“Okay, now what do you do if you’re on a steep downhill grade, the road is really icy, your brakes are locked up, and at the bottom of the hill is a narrow bridge with a hazardous materials truck coming the other way at you?”
Charlie thinks a minute, and he says “Well, I’d reach over and shake old Joe awake because he ain’t never seen a wreck like we’re about to have!”
There was no training, but I’m sure I’ll pick it up as I go!
Working for the carnival, I hauled the world’s largest pair of glasses the other week.
It was quite the spectacle!
How can you tell if your wife is cheating on you with a Swift driver?
When you come home from a two-week trip and he’s still trying to back out of the driveway!
One time Chuck Norris peed in the radiator of a semi-truck.
We now know that truck as Optimus Prime!
A Truck Carrying Jokes
A truck carrying antihistamine medicines spilled on the highway.
Strangely enough, there was no congestion!
A truck carrying blackberries spilled on the highway.
It was quite a traffic jam!
A truck carrying olive oil spilled on the highway.
It was a vicious situation!
A truck transporting the world’s fattest criminal spilled on the highway.
The felon is still at large!
A truck transporting biohazards spilled on the highway. It was a bloodbath.
A truck transporting ice cream spilled on the highway.
There was some rocky road!
A truck carrying tennis gear spilled on the highway.
It made quite the racket!
A truck carrying computers rigged as explosives spilled on the highway.
They had to call in a minesweeper!
A truck carrying cannabis spilled on the highway.
It tripped on a pothole!
A truck carrying camping gear spilled on the highway.
The truck had jackknifed!
A truck carrying money spilled on the highway.
There was a million dollars in damage!
A truck carrying expensive watches spilled on the highway.
It cost him a lot of time!
A truck carrying guns spilled on the highway.
Fortunately, nobody was armed in the accident!
A truck carrying construction tools spilled on the highway.
The driver had laid the hammer down too hard!
A truck carrying burger buns spilled on the highway.
It became the talk of sesame street!
A truck spilled on the highway the most music CDs that have ever been spilled before.
It was a new record!
A truck carrying apparel spilled on the highway.
The trucker was safe, thanks to a belt!
A truck carrying lions and elephants spilled on the highway.
The whole thing was a circus!
A truck carrying honey spilled on the highway.
Bears were on the scene fast!
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ABOUT TOPMARK FUNDING
At TopMark Funding® client satisfaction is our top priority. With 20+ years of experience in the trucking industry financing and leasing straight and box trucks for owner-operators and fleet owners. We know what it takes to get you approved for the best truck financing deal possible.
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We’re not here for the short term, we’re on the long haul with you. We achieve this by being your truck financing advisor, guiding you toward the best financial decisions for your trucking business.
We have financing options for box trucks, semi-trucks and trailers, and small businesses. We have great rates, low down payments, and flexible monthly payments regardless of credit history.
Fill out the contact form or give us a call at (866) 627-6644. One of our truck financing specialists will contact you as soon as possible to review your commercial truck loan or lease needs and learn more about you and your business financing goals.
Nick was quick and gave us a great product with very competitive terms to fund three vehicles. Highly recommend!
Top mark is a great institution. Help me get my first truck. I don’t know if I could’ve done it without Nick and Rob. They really did a great job helping me out. I’m really grateful for them taking all the time and helping me with this new adventure in life.
Excellent experience start to finish ! I procrastinated for months before making a purchase. Nick was there every step of the way and answered every question quickly. When I finally decided to buy a truck, Nick took over and guided me through every step of the process, explained everything step by step and never left me wondering what was happening. Simple, quick, and flawless process. The guys in the title dept were the same. Very professional and helpful, efficient and polite. Great experience and I highly recommend !
I want to thank Patrick Smith and Nick Gilmore for there outstanding service in assisting me in buying a 2020 freightliner. They've made the process smooth and easy by keeping me informed with every step of the process. They were very informative and explain the contracts and options thoroughly. They were accessible whenever I needed help or an explanation. I look forward to working with these guys in the future. Thanks again.Shane cruz.
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TopMark Funding has an awesome team and dedicated staff. I am very impressed by their hard work to get my truck financing done as quickly as possible. Nick Piring and Nick Gilmore did an extraordinary job keeping me informed about every step during the process. Absolutely I will recommend them and consider them for futures financially needs.Nick Piring, Nick Gilmore and the team, thanks for the experience.
Top Mark is definitely the place to get your financing. I can honestly attest they will fight for their clients tooth and nail... I was so lucky to have Dan Burden as my representative or this probably wouldn't be happening for me... He was a friend all the way through the process... He even found me a good deal on insurance which was very much needed... I will be coming back for sure!!!
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TopMark is the Best route to get commercial vehicle funding in 2024. I needed funding fast for my new box truck I wanted to purchase and the experts at TopMark delivered! My finance rep I was working with was Rob W and he was able to get me the amount I needed in the 1 week time frame I was working with. In the end I was approved and had the truck delivered by the end of that week. Very easy to understand process and full transparency from them the hole way.I highly recommend this place for any young motivated new business owners who don’t think there’s any real help for us out there. These guys got your back, they care about you and don’t just treat you like a number. Ask for Rob W and tell him Nick from 1010 Transportation sent you!
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This company is top notch for sure. Not only did James Wilson get me approved for a truck loan he also helped me battle the dealership that sold me a bad truck that needed a new motor it took 3 months of back and forth with this dealership and James stayed in the fight the whole time everyday with me to get them to trade me out for a good truck I can't say enough about this guy stellar human being would do business with him again anyday. Thanks top mark and James Wilson your awesome man
برایم ایمیلی امد که برنده ۲۵۰ هزار دولار شده ام و باید وارد سایت شوید و چند سوال را جواب دهید و من هم وارد سایشان شدم و به سوالات شان جواب دادم سوالات شان منتقی بود و با تجربه بودن و نسبت به دیگران مسعولیت پذیر هستند ولی ببینیم تا بعد چه میشود پول به دست مان میرسد بردمان یا نه خالاصه تجربه خوبی بود با سپاس
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My first Tractor purchase detailed in one word? EFFORTLESSCindy & Andrea kept me informed thoughout the process. They exceeded my expecations, when they qualified my approval within 24 hours after the application...I woke up to a message: ApprovedThey actually qualified me for more money then I spent on the purchase itself. I am very fortunate to have these ladies at the helm... I now have a go to for my funding needs, as my company continues to grow. TOPMARK is Top NOTCH! And Cindy & Andrea are a major reason why...thanx so much 🙂
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Definitely great team to help me out to purchase my FORD TRANSIT AWD 2023. Very helpful, and patient. I do appreciate to all, and Mr Thomas Battistella that made things happen. THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH.
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